7 Hints and Spot The Bitch

7 Hints and Spot The Bitch



BITCH is composed of Bitches. There are many definitions of a bitch. The most complimentary definition is a female dog. Those definitions of bitches who are also homo sapiens are rarely as objective and in fact they are an insult to female dogs. They vary from person to person and depend strongly on how much of a bitch the definer considers herself.

Hint 1: It is also generally agreed that a Bitch is aggressive, and therefore unfeminine (ahem). She may be sexy, in which case she becomes a Bitch Goddess, a special case which will not concern us here. “Bitches are aggressive, domineering, overbearing, spiteful, hostile, blunt, obnoxious, thick-skinned, hard-headed, vicious, dogmatic, competitive, pushy, loud-mouthed, stubborn, demanding, manipulative, egoistic, overwhelming, threatening, scarey, ambitious, tough, brassy, masculine, boisterous, and turbulent. Among other things ….

Don’t judge a book by its cover unless that book is a ****ing annoying bitch who needs to be high fived in the face with a chair.

Hint 2: A Bitch occupies a lot of psychological space. You always know she is around. A Bitch takes shit from no one. You may not like her, but you cannot ignore her. Bitches are big, tall, strong, large, loud, brash, harsh, awkward, clumsy, sprawling, strident, ugly. Bitches move their bodies freely rather than restrain, refine and confine their motions in the proper feminine manner. They have loud voices and often use them. Bitches are not pretty to have an argument with, so you would do better to say YES to her demands.

Smartass Student : ‘a man must have his own master’. Master of Stupidity: ‘yea, everyone’s somebody’s bitch’.

Hint 3: Bitches seek their identity strictly thru themselves and what they do. They are subjects, not objects. They may have a relationship with a person or organization, but they never marry anyone or anything; man, mansion, or movement.

If I was really a bitch I’d make your life a living hell. Instead, I’ll just stand by and watch you do that yourself. You seem to do a pretty good job at it.

Hint 4: Bitches prefer to plan their own lives rather than live from day to day, action to action, or person to person. They are independent cusses and believe they are capable of doing anything they damn well want to. If something gets in their way; well, that’s why they become Bitches.They seek self-expression and self-actualization. Whatever they do, they want an active role and are frequently perceived as domineering.

Sometimes you have to be a bitch to get things done.                                                                                                           

Hint 5: Their attitudes towards themselves and other people, their goal orientations, their personal style, their appearance and way of handling their bodies, all jar people and make them feel uneasy. Sometimes it’s conscious and sometimes it’s not but people generally feel uncomfortable around Bitches. They consider them aberrations. They find their style disturbing. So they create a dumping ground for all who they deplore as bitchy and call them frustrated women. Frustrated they may be, but the cause is social not sexual.

A bitch always smokes. A bitch doesn’t need anybody. Or she wants people to think she doesn’t need anybody. And she smokes to prove it.

Hint 6: She is living testimony that woman’s oppression does not have to be, and as such raises doubts about the validity of the whole social system. Because she is a threat she is not taken seriously. Instead, she is dismissed as a deviant.

She didn’t care that people called her a bitch. ‘It’s just another word for feminist,’ she told me with pride.

Hint 7: Teenage girls are particularly vicious in the scapegoat game. This is the time of life when women are told they must compete the hardest for the spoils (i.e. men) which society allows. They must assert their femininity or see it denied. They are very unsure of themselves and adopt the ridigity that goes with uncertainty. They are hard on their competitors and even harder on those who decline to compete. Those of their peers who do not share their concerns and practice the arts of charming men are excluded from most social groupings. If she didn’t know it before, a Bitch learns during these years that she is different.

If bitches could fly, school would be a f***ing airport.                                                                                                           

Adapted from “The Bitch Manifesto